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  • Writer's pictureBrian Lovegrove

How To Create A Happy State of Mind

Updated: Jul 9, 2020

Most people don’t understand that everything we do, is to either change or maintain the way we feel. Stop a moment and think about the things you want. New car, better job, more money. Why do you want them?

Let’s take more money since it is on almost everyone’s list. Why do you want more money? To get the pieces of paper with the faces of dead notables on it? No, because of the things that it can be used for. To have more stuff. To do more things. Why do you want those things? If you keep asking why, you find that you will eventually arrive at a feeling. A way to meet your needs to give you a specific feeling. A feeling of security, happiness, appreciation, love.

Most people want to feel good feelings instead of bad ones. Although some people get comfortable with their bad feelings and that gives them good feelings. I know that sounds weird, but when you understand the way the subconscious mind works, it makes sense. But that is another whole topic.

Want to know the shortcut? How you can change the way you feel in an instant? It is really easy. It is a strategy called state management. This is a major strategy I teach as part of the Incredible Results Program.

I will share with you the basics. All you need to do is change three things:

1. What you are focusing on

2. What you are telling yourself

3. How you are using your body


You can change the way you feel simply by changing what you are focusing on. If you are looking for all the reasons why something is NOT working, you will never find a solution. All you get is why it won’t work. Focus on the positive, the benefit, the lesson you can learn, and you will experience a much different feeling than if you focus on everything going wrong, the pain and suffering, and the wasted effort.

To a create state of happiness, you have to focus on the joy in life, what is good, what is funny, what you can be grateful for in every situation. Not what is missing or wrong.


The language we use is powerful. Words are the greatest weapon we have for building up or for tearing down. The person we talk to the most is ourselves. You can tear yourself down or you can build yourself up simply by changing the words you tell yourself.

To maintain a state of happiness, you need to tell yourself you are growing, making progress towards your goals. That life is fun and exciting.

The most powerful tool to affect both focus and language is the questions we ask ourselves. If you are always asking “Why does this always happen to me?” your subconscious mind will come with all kinds of reasons. The same is true when you ask the question “Why am I so lucky/blessed?”


This is how we use our body. How we stand or sit, position of our head, our shoulders, our feet. Even the smallest shift can make a huge difference. I am sure you could describe someone who is angry, afraid, or excited. You are describing the way they are using their body to facilitate that emotion. You can’t change the way you feel without changing the way you are holding your body. One of the most powerful ways is how someone is breathing.

There is a biofeedback loop between our minds and our body. Shift one and you shift the other. It is impossible to assume the body position of happy and excited and feel sad and depressed.

Think about it, how do you breathe, stand, hold your shoulders, hold your head, use your face, etc. when you are happy? Start by smiling. (DON’T YOU DARE SMILE!! That would lead to positive uplifting feelings.)

Then just repeat that and you will start to feel happy.

Now, you can use one of these or you can use all three. If you don’t like the way you are feeling, just change your focus, your physiology and or your language. The harder part is making it a permanent shift to more of what you want to feel. Anyone can feel happy for a moment. It takes regular practice and shifting your beliefs about your life in order to develop an ongoing state of happiness.

To learn more about us, visit and if you are interested in learning how we can help you, schedule your complimentary Discovery Session where we will discuss where you are, where you want to go, and how we can help you get there.

Have a great day and strive for excellence!

Brian Lovegrove

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